The gift of friendship
Nevertheless, friendship is a beautiful thing that has embedded in it benefits that can last a life time. I see friendship as a vehicle that moves one from one level to another. Its a connection that springs up pleasures and lessens burdens. Its a garden that grows in the right atmosphere mixed with love, sincerity and tireless giving. I know some people who have been rather unfortunate in friendship and I think it happened probably because such didn't give his/her heart to details, correctly defining why they should go into what I love to call covenant friendship.
I have had the opportunity to counsel young ones on issues that arise from wrong choices. If you understand the dynamics and vital part the choice of friendship you make, it will limit the heart breaks/damages prevalent today. Friends can make or mar you. So, get an understanding of how it can affect your life on a long run, it will make you careful! Hold good friends tight that tell you the truth no matter how painful it is, Know who you are, your core values and your direction in life.
Your personality/ character also should determine who you bring or allow into your life. This sure starts from the foundation by this, I mean at a very early stage. Parents are the best models and mentors in this area. As a child, I wasn't allowed to mingle with children who were not excellent in character, academics,had no good family background and children who couldn't speak well(Dad despised pidgin English). So parents must be deliberate in teaching their children the importance of friendship and how to select them.
For my parents, once they didn't fit into that standard, I knew it was a no!no! Some children called my sibs and I proud(some people still think I am proud because of this) but it shaped our mindset and picture of whom we allow into our lives. We had an understanding that this basics would affect us later if we don't get it right. As an adult, the list has increased but I built on an already existing foundation laid.
I have heard people say over and again " I don't need friends, I don't need friends, friends are evil, I don't need anybody, I can make it on my own". Sure you might but do you know how hard/ impossible it will be for you to walk alone? Is it safer?When life pushes you, who comes to your rescue? Religious folks will say 'God!" But God uses people all the time. (. . . . . . . and with him went men of valor whose hearts God had touched. 1Samuel 10:26 ESV). Everyone needs someone to help in his life assignment. The truth remains that, good people still exists. Just don't rush into friendship, be prudent with picking them. They might be a few but quality is far better than quantity. Its never about the number, it about the value that will be added.
God deliberately has placed people around you to help you through life, when you ignore them, you lose out on the 'ministry of help'. You also won't adequately harness all the potentials such friends may have.
I'm a excellent example of help. God has used friends to help me in life. You can call it favour but it comes from God alone. I also believe that God orchestrated everyone of them to come into my life when they did and I have never had regrets being a friend in return.
I have come to a conclusion that the ideology of not keeping friends is satanic. That ideology was made to kill destinies and to over burden young ones whose impact can change the course of events when they have good people in their lives. The devil has plants bad friends around them to make them think there can't be helpers who wear friendship clothing's as a result of bad experiences. No man is an island. (A friend loves at all times, and is born, as is a brother, for adversity prov 17:17 Amp). You can't continue to suffer when people around you can sincerely help. I have had terrible people come my way but with time, I showed them the door out of my life forever. Life is too short to live in regrets.
I also strongly believe that God designed family for tough times/support. I hear some folks boast about being independent of friends and families. It only explains to an enlightened mind how ignorant such people are in this areas. Independence is good but help(friends)is always better. It's easier when you have friends at your finger tips. My Pastor once said, if you always have to pay all you bills by yourself, you are yet to step into a higher dimension of grace and help."
Friends/family are precious gifts to any man. Develop yourself in this area, define your values/standards, trust the Holy Spirit and he will lead you to the kind of friends/family members that can be a guide through your path in life. I call such friends and families 'destiny lifters'.
A man who despises members of his household will soon be sold out by outsiders. I know that some family members could be terrible. I have personal experiences and that of others to portray this points but there are still those who honestly have your interests at heart. They just need an opportunity to show you that expression of love that will give you that spark. Don't push them away! Some are either incapacitated or forces beyond them prevents them. Pray for their release and keep your heart open. They may be just that help you have prayed for all your life.
Stop bragging about your independence and start building profitable friends that will stand by you in every situation.
I once saw a movie where a seemingly successful lady lost both parents who were her anchor. She had a fiancée who loved her so much but the pain of losing both parents made her drive him and others away from her life. She got the opportunity to project into her future and saw that later in life, all she would have been left with will be just fortune and wealth(both evidence of her supposed hard work) with nobody to show her love or to stand by her.
This shows the importance of people in our lives. There are things that matter most in life. The company you keep is one of them. Be sure to also be that friend that adds value to others and one who is a loyal/ committed friends. Friendship requires real hard work but the end result is always fulfilment. Don't be that individual who runs away from friendship because of the responsibilities that comes with it. Responsible people are never afraid of responsibilities
Nice WriteUP
ReplyDeleteTrue friendship can be likened to a pillar of building. How can a building stand without a pillar?
ReplyDeleteNow,looking at the life of Jesus,it was recorded that He called His disciples friends. That's to show how the importance of friendship can't be over emphasised. I pray the Lord grants us the spirit to discern true friends that will help to shapen and add value to us and we also will be a channel of blessing to them as well.
Tnx so much sir/ma for your comment. The devil has held so many ppl captive in this area of friendship. Good friends still exists
DeleteTrue friendship can be likened to a pillar of building. How can a building stand without a pillar?
ReplyDeleteNow,looking at the life of Jesus,it was recorded that He called His disciples friends. That's to show how the importance of friendship can't be over emphasised. I pray the Lord grants us the spirit to discern true friends that will help to shapen and add value to us and we also will be a channel of blessing to them as well.
"Your personality/character also should determine who you bring or allow into your life."
ReplyDeleteNice write-up! Many thanks. No matter how old or common the topic of Friendship is, it's still as important as determining the destiny of an individual. Like the writer rightly said, parents must show their children the right path and lead them to God, especially when they are still very young otherwise the very purpose of their birth would be defeated.
Very true. Its all starts from childhood.
DeleteWe would talk extensively on this aspect in our next post
Thank you for reading.